I’m fumin’ right now. Word is that Amazon has nabbed control of the James Bond franchise, and I reckon they’ll butcher it just like they did with Lord of the rings. Let’s be honest: 007 is an icon, a proper institution that’s always had a certain style. But now, we can kiss Pinewood Studios goodbye and brace ourselves for what might be the “wokest” version yet. Mark me words, they’ll twist Bond into summat unrecognisable. They’ve got endless bags of cash, tossing money around like it’s confetti to push daft agendas that nobody asked for. It’s infuriating, really. And you know what gets me most? The absolute greed of Jeff Bezos... He really doesn’t give a toss about destroying the franchise’s legacy. He’s only after more power and control, and he’s not bothered what he steps on and ruins. It’s a proper disgrace, if you ask me. Everything we know and love about James Bond will be shoved aside in the name of profits and a woke “vision.” Anyway, that’s my piece. I’d love to hear what you lot think—are you as peeved as I am, or is there still hope for 007? Sound off below and let’s have a proper chat together. #JamesBond #FranchiseTakeover #KeepBondClassic #WokeWoes #FanRant

Wow, folks, HUGE announcement: I never fail—EVER! If my last term didn’t go perfectly, it’s 100% because ALL those interfering losers ruined my genius plans. Everyone knows my policies are flawless, but those meddlers just can’t handle my greatness. This time around, NOTHING will stand in my way! My hands are massive and so are my plans! #NeverWrong #BigPlansBiggerHands

Billions and billions of our hard-earned taxpayer dollars went right down the drain, all because the previous administration cared more about hugging trees than protecting our borders. But guess what? Now that I'm on my second term, get ready for a whole lot LESS green around here—you're welcome! ♻️❌ Why waste time saving this sad planet when we can hop on some giant rockets and settle on other lovely planets? I know a top-notch rocket guy—he’s a friend, loves me, wants to help us blast off! All it takes is a few trillion in his back pocket (peanuts, folks!) and a we’ll leave behind this polluted rock full of complaining folks who just don’t get it! Who needs clean air or water when you can have dusty craters and no oxygen? We’re done humoring Earth’s whiners. Time to colonize outer space, folks! Trust me, you’ll LOVE it there—no trees to worry about, no pesky environmental laws, no problem! #SpaceIsGreat #NoTreesNoProblems #MarsOrBust #SecondTermVictory #RonaldDumpIsBack

USA! USA! USA! Folks, nobody loves this country more than me—believe me! We’re the biggest, the bravest, the boldest, and, quite frankly, the only country that really matters. A real island of greatness (just ignore those other annoying countries up north and down south—total disasters, okay?). Why bother with the rest of the world? They’re just a bunch of ungrateful nobodies who refuse to recognize how spectacular our burgers, our flags, and especially ME are! America first, second, third, and last—it’s all about the USA, people! We’re number one, and that’s how it’s gonna stay. Why share the spotlight with anyone else? America first means every American comes first…except all the losers who disagree with me (they’re probably not even real Americans). Let’s keep all the greatness right here where it belongs. The rest of the world can figure itself out—if it can! USA! USA! USA! (And if you disagree…well, too bad! Ask everyone—nobody likes a complainer!) #AmericaFirst #USABest #SorryNotSorry #TremendousLeadership #HugeSuccess #MakingAmericaStayOnTop 🦅🇺🇸🦅🇺🇸🦅🇺🇸

Folks, I’m declaring it right now: WE NEED TO TAKE OVER CANADA ASAP! Don’t worry, I know exactly how to do it—nobody knows Canada like I do, believe me. It’s time to make Canada great again by making it AMERICA again. They’ve got maple syrup and moose, we’ve got greatness. Combine the two, we get the biggest, most tremendous synergy the world has ever seen! #MakeCanadaAmericaAgain #HugeTakeover #WinningSoMuch 🇺🇸🦅

Folks, let me just say — the White House? Way too pale! We need to paint it ORANGE immediately, bigly orange, so bright they can see it from space! Believe me, nobody does color better than me. My orange palace will be the greatest sight in history. People from everywhere will say, ‘Wow, that’s a really tremendous glow!’ And I’m the only one to make that happen. We’ll pass a fantastic policy — The Orange House Act — no one’s ever heard of a policy like this, but it’ll be HUGE, believe me! Let’s make every wall GLOW, every column SPARKLE. I promise, once we go orange, everything will be absolutely perfect — the best in the world. Major critics are already jealous! #WhiteHouse #SoBright #FromSpace #WinningBigTime 🏆✌️

Folks, believe me, nobody loves giving more free cash to our fabulous friends in Silicone Valley than me—no one! I already pledged hundreds of billions of taxpayer dollars to those totally struggling, super-poor billionaires. But it’s STILL not enough! We’ve gotta slash that lousy government health care for those 9-to-5 people who think they deserve healthcare or something. Give me a break! We need that money for the brilliant billionaires building who-knows-what AI gizmos. They’re struggling, folks! How else will their big businesses keep going if we don’t prop them up? These guys are the nicest, they give me all sorts of free stuff! Remember—there’s no problem tax payer money can’t fix if you just give it all to the top 1%! Tremendous plan, everyone agrees! #NoHealthcareNeeded #CashForTheRich #BillionairesFirst #GiveMeFreeStuff #GreatestPresidentEver 🤩💸🙌

Winning bigly here, folks. As the brand-new President of the Entire World (yes, THE WHOLE WORLD—no, the UNIVERSE!), I’m making everything totally tremendous—believe me. First order of business: Mandatory 25-hour workdays for everyone, because I said so. Next, we’ll build a 100ft border wall in everyones backyard—why? To keep those damn gnome people out with all their drugs and crime—amazing, right? Trust me, it’s gonna be HUGE, you losers. If you don’t like it, well, tough luck—I’ve got the biggest hands in the WORLD and I’m not afraid to use them! Now bow down to your glorious leader... or else!

Sometimes you wonder why you even bother going to church. I went this Sunday, and yet again, nobody so much as looked in my direction. It’s happened countless times before, in different churches, and it’s always the same story. Modern churches in England seem so cliquey—taken over by people who only care about social status rather than genuine faith. It’s sad and kind of pathetic seeing these middle-class snoots form little circles, deciding who’s in or out based on careers or perceived social status rather than kindness or love. Most folks there don’t seem loving or caring at all. They’re too busy trying to climb the social ladder and have no time for anyone who doesn’t fit their mold 😞. The problem is that people, even in church, can be incredibly selfish and cold, forgetting the true purpose of gathering as the body of Christ. The solution lies in remembering what Jesus taught us. In John 13:34 (NIV), it says, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.” Jesus wants us to be more than a social club. We should reach out, welcome others, and care like the good shepherd who looks after every single sheep. I keep going because church is about God, not the flawed people who sometimes miss the point. Lord, please help me and others be the change we want to see. Strengthen our hearts to love genuinely, treat others how we’d want to be treated, and overcome any divisions we encounter 🙏. #Faith #LoveOneAnother #ChurchLife #GodIsGood

Many conservative Christians in America have been led to believe that Donald Trump is a committed Christian, yet I urge you not to be misled. He has presented himself as if he stands for Christian values, but when we look at his words and actions, we see a glaring discrepancy. He appears more interested in self-exaltation than in following the example of Christ, and he has manipulated Christians into giving him their votes. The Bible tells us to observe the “fruit” in a person’s life. According to Galatians 5:22-23 (NIV), “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” These qualities are non-negotiable for a true believer, yet we repeatedly see Trump engaging in unkind rhetoric, promoting cruel or divisive policies, and belittling those who oppose him. Donald Trump frequently flaunts his religious beliefs to appeal to conservative Christians, at times portraying himself as the chosen one sent by God. He once shared a video proclaiming that he was sent by God. Yet true faith calls for humility and meekness—virtues noticeably absent in his boastful rhetoric. As Psalm 82:2 (NIV) says, “How long will you defend the unjust and show partiality to the wicked?” We should ask ourselves whether his policies uphold justice or lean toward injustice. Donald Trump’s actions mirror the kind of leaders the psalmist warned about—those who assert authority while neglecting true righteousness. Even if he insists he is a Christian, we must discern whether his life and choices align with Jesus’s example. Does he protect the vulnerable, or does he cast them aside? Does he act with generosity, or does he sow division? Does he live by biblical truth, or does he place himself above it? The solution to this problem is recognizing that authentic faith is evidenced by consistent obedience to God’s Word. We must look beyond slogans and examine a person’s deeds. Jesus tells us, “Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves.” (Matthew 7:15 NIV) These are strong words, but they urge us to be cautious. We cannot let the noise of politics drown out the Holy Spirit’s guidance or make us ignore actions that are contrary to the gospel. A humble heart that seeks God’s will over personal ambition is the mark of a believer, not empty words or political showmanship. Let us remember that true Christianity teaches respect for the downtrodden, compassion for the outsider, and fairness for all. When we see Christians being snooty, uncaring, or obsessed with personal status, we can be sure that we have drifted away from Christ’s example. We should stand against those who misuse faith as a shallow prop and instead honor leaders who genuinely live out biblical principles. Let us pray: “Almighty God, we ask for Your wisdom to recognize true discipleship. Give us discernment to see beyond words and notice the fruit of actions. Guard our hearts from deception, keep us focused on Your truth, and fill us with courage to stand for justice and compassion. May we remain steadfast in following You alone. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.” #Christian #UprightLiving #SpeakTruth #StayVigilant #FaithInAction ✝️🙏

The vast majority of people in my experience that go to church aren’t Christian at all. Nowadays, churches feel more like middle-class social clubs than gatherings of believers striving to honor God. The atmosphere can be cold and exclusive, driving away anyone who doesn’t fit a certain mold. For example, you might walk into a new church only to be judged by your job, your clothing, or where you live. It’s not just off-putting—it’s downright wrong. Who would want to stay where they’re made to feel insignificant or invisible? When the first question is “What do you do for a living?” followed by a condescending look or remark—and then the person goes on to boast about being a doctor or engineer, implying they’re somehow better—it’s no surprise people don’t come back. This attitude isn’t Christian love; it’s a social ladder competition masquerading as fellowship. It’s evil. Scripture gives a clear warning against showing favoritism. James 2:1-4 (NIV) states: “My brothers and sisters, believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ must not show favoritism. Suppose a man comes into your meeting wearing a gold ring and fine clothes, and a poor man in filthy old clothes also comes in. If you show special attention to the man wearing fine clothes and say, ‘Here’s a good seat for you,’ but say to the poor man, ‘You stand there’ or ‘Sit on the floor by my feet,’ have you not discriminated among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?” This scripture couldn’t be clearer. By treating people differently based on outward status, we become “judges with evil thoughts.” That’s a serious charge. It shows how damaging favoritism is, and it stands in direct contrast to Jesus’ command to love one another. The problem is this toxic culture that values status over the word of god. True Christianity calls us to love people genuinely, yet countless churches have become cliquey gatherings where professionals brag about themselves and belittle others. Instead of embracing every life that walks through the doors, they push aside the very individuals Christ came to rescue. The solution is to return to the biblical model of church: a place for broken, imperfect people to encourage and strengthen each other in faith. We need to repent of elitist attitudes, love our neighbors as ourselves, and remember that any grace we have received from God is unearned. When we focus on humility and compassion, we open up space for authentic fellowship and real transformation. 🙏 Ask yourself if you’re truly at church to serve God or just to keep up appearances. In the end, it’s our heart before the Lord that matters, not our job title, our clothes, or our social rank. Let’s stand against this harmful culture and build churches that reflect Jesus’ love. May we abandon worldly prestige and become communities of genuine care. 🔥 Heavenly Father, we call upon You, the one and true God, to forgive us when we look down on others. Soften our hearts and help us be welcoming to all, regardless of status or background. Guide us to love one another without expecting anything in return. Remind us each day that we are all equal in Your eyes and that we must reflect Your kindness in our words and actions. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen. 🙏 #NoFavoritism #BiblicalLove #HumilityMatters #LoveOneAnother #ChurchUnity #ServeGodNotMan

Too many of us worry more about other people’s opinions than about what Jesus thinks. As a result, we stay silent instead of reaching out. This is uncaring, because if we truly believed that those who don’t know Jesus are heading down a path of separation from God, wouldn’t we want to speak up? 😔 Jesus didn’t hold back when searching for lost sheep. He came, as it says in Luke 19:10 (NIV), “For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost.” He knew exactly why He was on earth. We are called to continue His mission. When we stay quiet out of fear or laziness, we fail the very people we’re supposed to help. Romans 10:14 (NIV) says, “How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them?” This verse shows us clearly that people can’t believe in someone they’ve never heard of. If they remain in darkness, it’s partly because we choose to hide the light. We must remember Jesus’ command in Matthew 28:19 (NIV): “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.” This is not a suggestion; it’s our mandate. Let’s pray for courage to set aside our worries about looking bigoted or offending others. Let’s remember that it’s far more loving to share truth than to stay silent just to fit in. Taking action can be as small as starting a real conversation with someone about faith, or as big as organizing outreach events. What matters is that we do something, trusting that God will use our steps of faith. 😇 Dear Lord, please shake us up. Give us the boldness we need to share Your truth. Help us to love others enough to tell them about Jesus. Fill us with passion, energy, and compassion for the people around us. May we not waste another moment lingering in fear, but instead trust in Your power to guide us. We pray this in the name of Jesus, the one who saves us. Amen. #Faith #Jesus #Gospel #Action 🙏