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CringeWorthy: The Kardashians and MonkeyGate

I'm sorry. Nobody could be that stupid or insensitive by accident. If you were going to pick a pet to publicize on a reality show, why would you pick one that's in the headlines for a savage attack unless you're looking for a little drama?

I've never liked monkeys (or chimpanzees or orangutans) as pets. I had a friend once who had a baby monkey. I wouldn't even hold it. I didn't like the way it looked at me, like it was going to fix us all someday for keeping it captive. I remember the original Planet of the Apes, people. It was creepy.

The chimpanzee attack of a woman in Connecticut was horrifying, and only served to illustrate the point that such animals do not make suitable pets. Have you seen the teeth on a chimpanzee? If and when that animal grows up and decides to take over, it often ends up being killed in self-defense. And it's not just primates: there are plenty of big cats, giant pythons and alligators in animal refuges after being confiscated. Most of the time it's before a tragedy can occur, but not always.

That's why when I read that the Kardashians had bought themselves a baby monkey I was disgusted. Were they hoping something bad would happen, or blissfully ignorant of current events? It's hard to tell with those folks. After a public outcry, the famewhoring family issued a statement that they had only rented the animal for a week, to shoot scenes for the upcoming season of their show. Oh, so if it had attacked and mauled one of the younger children it would have been OK. They'd probably use the footage, too.













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