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November 26, 2007

Reality Sucks: After 25 Years, The Hogans Call It Quits




Too bad Hulk never asked his wife that same question he asked fans over the years: "What are you gonna do when Hulkamania runs wild on you?" Simple. File for divorce and ask for half of everything.


Gee, this couldn't have anything to do with the fact that their reality show won't be renewed, could it? Is it because they'll probably lose everything when the family of Nick's paralyzed friend, John, sues them? Or is it just because they got sick of fighting over the spray tan and peroxide? Whatever the reason, Linda Bollea, Hulk Hogan's wife, has filed for divorce after 25 years, citing "irreconcilable differences". She has also asked for an equitable distribution of their assets.

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Poor Hulk, aka Terry, was caught unaware when a reporter called him for a comment on the filing. Big, dumb lug never saw it coming. Of course this is the guy who makes Patrick Starfish look like a Rhodes scholar. Somehow in the company of his family he actually looked almost bright, but even then, Lordy, breeding shows! This tribe would be equally at home in a tar paper shack or an aluminum double-wide trailer.

Will Hulk go on? Sure. Expect to see him revive his wrestling career once the house and cars get repo'd. A guy's gotta pay for his tan. If he had even half a brain he could be his daughter's manager, a la Simpson or Blohan, but then he might have to read something.



 


 





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