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October 24, 2007

Parental Disasters The Hogans Astound Us Yet Again

CringeWorthy, Diary, Loser Watch


Ever watch that lame-ass show, Hogan Knows Best? It stars Hulk and Linda Hogan as the brainless and ineffectual parental units, Brooke as the could-be-pretty-if-she-wasn't-so-masculine daughter and Nick as the classic sociopath and chronically unemployed son. Turns out it's not all just an act after all.


It wasn't bad enough that they allowed their "little" (compared to, say, bison or polar bears) princess to get a boob job. Then they let her get on stage in assless pants. On multiple occasions.

hogan%20kids.jpg

I guess Nick couldn't stand to see Brooke getting all the hate mail, so he decided to become a street racer. He progressed fairly rapidly from regular speeding infractions to a serious crash that left his good friend, John Graziano, in a vegetative state, but he's still not facing charges. After being dismissed by the Mopar Team, he finally got smart, and kept a low profile until the press died down.

According to TMZ, Nick is moving on with his life (because unlike his friend, John, he's still able to) he decided to start his own team, getting a pair of 350Z's and a sponsorship from Polaroid. That's just wrong on so many levels.

Nick Hogan should be in jail for what he did. At the very least his parents should pay for John's medical care for the rest of his life. And they should keep that big, gamey swamp thing of a daughter locked up before it has a chance to propogate the line.



 


 





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