I'm sure the guy is talented. I just don't care for his brand of wishy-washy music. Your body is a wonderland? Does that mean you've only got a day pass so you're getting in all the rides you can? Every time you see him with a woman, he has this snide look on his face, like he expects everyone to see that he's clearly superior and he's getting it to go, not stay.

John Mayer just strikes me as being incredibly insincere, the kind of guy who will say anything to get what he wants. That might go over big with a girl like Jessica Simpson, who's still trying to get hooked on phonics ("Is it chicken, or is it tuna?"), but I'm not so easily fooled.

John will end up on the dinner circuit in years to come, warbling requested tunes from the guests with his guitar case at his feet, filling up with beer money. The Batman hoodie isn't going to fool that crowd, either. They'll tell him to get a haircut and play "Sweet Caroline" again.