Aging rocker Ozzy told the reporter, "Paris was always hanging around our house. I'm not sure if she was a friend of Kelly or Amy — which one was it, Sharon?"

Sharon replied, "She was Jack's, erm, friend."

The reporter writes that Ozzy's jaw dropped and he exclaimed, "He didn't shag her, did he? Well done, my son!"

WELL DONE? Ugh! How typical AND disgusting! Screw Paris going to jail for driving while under the influence or violating her probation. Lock the broad up in Alcatraz and throw away the key. I argue that sleeping with Jack Osbourne is a crime worthy of capital punishment.

And to think, I was almost starting to feel sorry for the jailbird!

BY EMMIS RODRIGUEZ