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December 20, 2005

A Giant Among Men Is Bound For Heaven

Dead


Vincent “The Chin? Gigante, one of the craftiest ever leaders of Cosa Nostra, has passed away at the age of 77. His passing, from as yet undetermined causes, occurred in the United States Medical Center for Federal Prisoners in Springfield, MO.

For many years, Chin evaded government prosecution by pretending to be a deranged man with an IQ of about 70. His many followers and admirers could never understand why he didn’t run for president, given those qualifications, which have worked for others. Too smart for his own good, prosecutors eventually proved that his IQ was over 70, and so they could throw the book at him on racketeering charges.

His nickname has adorable origins. His mother always called him Cincenzo, a diminutive form of Vincente; it got shortened to Chin, and stuck. As a security measure, he had ordered all Cosa Nostra members to never say his name, but to point at their chins when speaking of him. The Bosh now is touching our chin, with a prayer that this man’s soul should ascend to heaven in the dirty bathrobe the guy used to wear around Greenwich Village as part of his deranged, low IQ act. Gigante, by the way, is the Italian word for giant. (By Scott Rose)




 


 





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