Now that Kate Moss has been set free from the posh Meadows rehab center, she might want to evaluate her career goals. Kate dear, what is the point of trying to stick with these fashion companies when you know that at the slightest snort, they're going to drop you like a dead rat? Why not instead sign up with purveyors of recreational accoutrements?

Elephantos, for example, can furnish customers with all their skiing needs, from poles and lifts to mother-of-pearl-this and mother-of-pearl-that. Just think, Kate, how your face will motivate millions to take ski vacations! And the concept can be combined with the joyous holiday season: "Frosty, the snow-waif, had a very itchy nose!"

For warmer weather fun, Kate, you can promote playing in the grass. You could exponentially increase the demand for cannabis vaporizers, a luxury item. Then too, you could enhance the sales of prized sinsemilla seeds. For our part, we are just thrilled that, one way or another, Kate Moss will be involved with high, very high fashion. (By Scott Rose)